The Midlife Money Check-Up
You might be earning well, paying the mortgage and contributing to KiwiSaver, but when did your finances last get a proper warrant of fitness?
Zara Malcolm, financial adviser and founder of female-focused financial planning business FoundHer, says if you’ve reached your 40s or 50s without really looking at the numbers, it’s not too late.
There is one question Zara Malcolm would start with if a woman came to her wanting a midlife money check-up.
“What does your life cost?”
It’s the first thing she wants to establish, because once you know what your life actually costs, you can see more clearly what you have available to put towards the future, and what you might need later.
It’s a simple enough question, but midlife has a habit of making money complicated.
There may still be a mortgage. Teenagers can make a grocery bill look slightly ridiculous. Adult children may still need help. There are ageing parents, career changes, periods of part-time work and, for some women, separation or divorce.
And somewhere in among all of that, retirement starts to feel close enough that you probably should have a plan.
For women, there are some uncomfortable numbers sitting in the background.
Retirement Commission research published in 2026 found the average KiwiSaver balance for women was $38,212, compared with $47,452 for men. The gap widens through midlife. Among those aged 56 to 60, women had an average balance of $63,556 compared with $86,163 for men, a difference of more than $22,000.
The gap isn’t simply a case of women failing to contribute. Lower lifetime earnings, part-time work and time out of paid employment all take their toll over the course of a working life.
Malcolm is wary of responding to that by simply giving women more homework.
Women in their 40s, 50s and 60s already have plenty on their plates, she says. The answer isn’t necessarily another financial literacy course.
“You just need to understand what’s going on in your life.”
Start with where you are now
Once you know what your life costs, Malcolm suggests getting a clear picture of what you own and what you owe.
That means looking at the obvious things, such as property, savings, KiwiSaver and other investments, alongside mortgages, credit cards and any other debt.
But net worth only tells part of the story.
Malcolm also wants women to know how much of their money they could actually access if the unexpected happens.
For many New Zealanders, a large chunk of wealth is sitting in property. You can look financially comfortable on paper and still have relatively little cash available if circumstances suddenly change.
“If something happened to you tomorrow, how much could you access? What would you be able to fund your life?” she says.
She would also want to know how much is being put aside for the future.
None of this requires a complicated financial plan. It is simply about knowing your starting point.
Give your KiwiSaver more than a passing glance
KiwiSaver can be easy to ignore.
Money comes out of your pay, statements arrive from time to time and, unless retirement feels particularly close, it tends to carry on quietly in the background.
Malcolm thinks it deserves a bit more attention.
She recommends knowing what fund you are in, whether it suits the amount of time you have before you expect to use the money, and what you are paying in fees.
“We’re already competing with lower lifetime earnings, so let’s try and claw back on fees where we can,” she says.
You don’t need to know everything there is to know about KiwiSaver. But it is worth checking that a decision made years ago still makes sense for you now.
Build a buffer before you need one
Malcolm doesn’t call hers an emergency fund.
She prefers support fund.
“I don’t want to call emergencies into my life,” she says.
Whatever you call it, the idea is to have money available when something unexpected happens.
Depending on individual circumstances, Malcolm says that might mean anywhere from around three months to a year of expenses.
“You need to have in your mind that this is for protection.”
It doesn’t necessarily need to be chasing high returns. The point is that you can get to it.
If you lose your income, face a large unexpected bill or need some time to work out what comes next, having accessible cash gives you options.
Malcolm also says that buffer should make sense alongside any insurance you have. She doesn’t advise on insurance herself, but believes women should understand what cover they have, why they have it and when it would pay.
The answer isn’t always to spend less
Money is tight for plenty of households, and Malcolm sees women who have spent years concentrating on simply getting through the week.
Some arrive in their late 50s saying, “I’ve just been in survival mode. I haven’t even thought about this.”
“And it kind of creeps up on them,” she says.
Budgeting has its place. But Malcolm thinks women are often encouraged to focus too heavily on what can be cut.
“As women, we’ve been kind of taught to go towards the budget.”
She wants earning capacity to be part of the conversation as well.
Could you negotiate a pay rise? Increase your hours? Change roles? Upskill? If you take time away from paid work, can you keep professional connections alive so that getting back in isn’t quite so hard?
A relatively small increase in income can have far more impact over the next 10 or 20 years than continually trying to shave a few more dollars off the weekly spend.
The $7 coffee probably isn’t helping if you buy three of them a day. But it’s unlikely to be the thing that makes or breaks your retirement plan.
Financial independence doesn’t mean separate finances
Financial independence within a relationship doesn’t have to mean keeping every dollar separate.
For Malcolm, it is much more about knowing what is going on and being able to access your own financial life.
Can you log into the bank accounts?
Is your name on them?
Do you know what you own?
Do you know what you owe?
Do you understand the mortgage?
Do you know what is happening with your KiwiSaver?
“Do you have access to the bank accounts? It’s scary that a lot of women can’t even log in,” Malcolm says.
She has seen people with very little visibility over their household finances and others who don’t know what assets exist.
She also believes women should have at least one bank account of their own.
“I think that’s a very big one, having at least one bank account for you.”
That isn’t about expecting the worst from your relationship.
Life changes, sometimes unexpectedly. Having some understanding of your finances, and access to money in your own name, simply gives you more security and more options.
The real cost of taking time out to raise children
When one person steps away from paid work to raise children, the financial discussion usually begins with whether the household can manage on one income.
Malcolm thinks couples should also talk about what that decision means for the person who is staying home.
When I asked whether the earning partner should consider continuing to contribute to the KiwiSaver of the partner caring for the children, her response was immediate.
“Definitely. I’m big on that.”
Because the cost of a career break is not limited to the salary missed during those years.
“It’s not just the missed wages and contributions, but if you do the maths of the compounding, as well as the job opportunities and potential earning capacity.”
There can be missed KiwiSaver growth, promotions that don’t happen and professional experience that becomes harder to regain.
Many women then return to paid work part-time or in roles below the level they might otherwise have reached.
The children may eventually grow up. The financial impact can last much longer.
If there’s some money left over, what then?
Malcolm doesn’t begin by telling people what investment to buy.
First she wants to know whether they have a support fund and whether there is high-interest debt that needs attention.
Then comes another important question.
“What is this money for?”
Money you expect to need in a couple of years has a very different job from money you are putting away for 20.
“What I would hammer home is that investing doesn’t need to be complicated. It doesn’t need to be hard,” Malcolm says.
But your timeframe, goals and tolerance for risk all matter, which is where individual advice can become useful.
What if you should have started years ago?
Looking at your finances properly for the first time can be uncomfortable, particularly if you don’t like what you find.
If you’re 50 and suddenly thinking you should have sorted all of this at 30, Malcolm has some reassurance.
She describes the 40s and 50s as something of a financial “sweet spot”.
“You still do have enough time to change the trajectory if it’s not going the way that you want,” she says.
“It’s never too late.”
Starting earlier may have been better.
Starting now is still better than not starting at all.
The shame factor
Money isn’t purely mathematical.
It can be wrapped up in decisions about careers, relationships, parenting and caring for other people. Looking at the numbers can bring up regrets about things we wish we had done differently.
“It’s confronting. It’s an emotional process,” Malcolm says. “You’re looking at life decisions that you’re needing to make. It’s not just money.”
There can also be embarrassment about not understanding something we think we should already know.
“We judge ourselves so harshly. We feel like we should know this all.”
Malcolm points out that there are plenty of things she doesn’t know either.
“I don’t know how to change a tyre,” she says.
What matters, she says, is having enough understanding to recognise whether what you are doing with your money is helping create the future you want.
“You do need to have some grasp of, ‘Is this translating to wealth or the life that I want?’ But you don’t need to be an expert.”
Retirement isn’t necessarily 65
Ask someone when they plan to retire and the answer is often an age.
Malcolm looks at it differently.
“Retirement, it’s not 65. It’s not an age. Lots of people don’t want to retire at 65. They want to go a bit earlier or a bit later, but it’s really a number.”
That number depends on the life you want to live.
What will it cost? What income will you have? What savings, KiwiSaver and other assets will be available?
Malcolm mentions an overseas rule of thumb of multiplying annual spending by 25, but says it is only a rough reference point and doesn’t directly account for New Zealand circumstances, including NZ Super.
There is no single retirement number that works for everyone.
The useful exercise is working out what the life you want might cost and whether your current financial position is taking you in roughly the right direction.
If it isn’t, knowing that now gives you time to make some changes.
Your midlife money check-up
Know what your life costs. Work out roughly what it takes to run your household and live the way you currently live.
Know what you own and what you owe. Include property, savings, KiwiSaver and other investments, along with mortgages and other debt.
Know what you could access. A healthy net worth doesn’t necessarily mean you have money available quickly.
Check your KiwiSaver. Look at your balance, contributions, fund type and fees.
Build a support fund. The right amount will depend on your circumstances, but accessible cash gives you options.
Understand your insurance. Know what cover you have and why.
Think about your earning capacity. What you can earn over the next decade or two matters as much as what you can trim from this week’s spending.
Stay involved in your household finances. Know where the accounts are, what you own, what you owe and how to access the money.
Account for the cost of caring. If one partner steps away from paid work, talk about KiwiSaver, lost income and the longer-term effect on earning power.
Think about the future you’re funding. Retirement will look different for everyone. The clearer you are about what you want, the easier it is to work out what needs attention now.
About Zara Malcolm
Zara Malcolm is a financial adviser and founder of FoundHer, a New Zealand fee-only, independent financial planning business built specifically for women.
Find out more about Zara and FoundHer: https://foundher.co.nz/
A note about financial information
This article is for general information and education only. It is not personalised financial advice and does not take into account your individual circumstances, financial situation, goals or tolerance for risk.
If you are making significant decisions about your finances, investments, insurance or KiwiSaver, consider seeking advice from a qualified financial adviser who can assess your individual circumstances.
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